Brother, Won’t You Buy A Drink for Iceland?
When a bottle of Icelandic Reyka Vodka showed up on my desk a few months ago, I read the press release that accompanied it with mild hostility: “You’ve already given your car, home, and office an eco-friendly makeover,” it declared, forcing me to respond: Actually, vodka, now that you bring it up, I haven’t. My car is old and broken, and my office is exactly how it was the day I showed up; people who give things eco-friendly makeovers are people who have way more time and money than I do.
But the press release ignored me, continuing: “Made in Iceland, Reyka Vodka uses geothermal energy to power their facilities—a clean and sustainable energy source. It’s one more step in the right direction.”
Yeah, I told the vodka, except that you’ve got to balance your geothermal energy with the petroleum used to haul vodka from Iceland to here, and Minnesotan farmers are raising corn for vodka right here. So is it more eco-friendly to buy Icelandic geothermal vodka or, say, Shakers Vodka, or Prairie Organic Vodka? I’m guessing the latter.
Ignoring me again, the press release raced on: “The United Nations recently awarded Iceland as ‘the best place to live’ based on life expectancy, education levels, and real per capita income. And, due to the fact that 72 percent of all energy used there is renewable, Iceland has clean air, unpolluted water, and happy inhabitants.”
To which I replied: Well you don’t need my help then, do you? For any PR professionals reading this, ‘We’ve got it all figured out’ is not a compelling marketing narrative.
But what a difference a few months make! Now poor, overextended Iceland is on the verge of bankruptcy and I feel for them. Doing my part for Iceland, last week I bought Emilíana Torrini’s CD (she’s kind of like Bjork, without the screeching). But what can you do? Well, if you buy a lot of premium vodka: Brother, you can spare Iceland a dime (or $24.99, which is actually what a liter of Reyka Vodka costs).
Also: I am hereby awarding this bottle of Reyka Vodka to the person who writes in with the best financial crisis story. Rules of the contest: Post up to 2,000 words on the financial crisis—tragic, personal, funny, whatever you’ve got—in the comments here before midnight, December 31, and I’ll award the vodka to whichever story I like best. (The contest is only open to people in the lower 48; I’m not mailing vodka back to Iceland, people.) Good luck.
Posted on Tuesday, December 9, 2008 in Permalink
Comments may be edited for length, clarity, or appropriateness.
Reader Comments:
Having tasted Reyka vodka (which isn't bad, but isn't all that either), I'll skip the 2000 word essay. Frankly, lowly Minnesota made vodkas compare quite favorably to Reyka. And I don't mean just Shakers.
The gold standard in my book remains the "shaken vodka martini with a twist test." Grey Goose still owns that one until someone can prove me wrong.
Reyka's best bet is to invent some strange new Icelandic martini that only TRULY tastes right with Reyka vodka. Now that's a contest truly worthy of a bottle (or 10) of Reyka.
This is not a story about me, but rather my brother, who could really use a drink.
Tom works for a small landscaping company that specializes in patio instillations and garden maintenance. This work is generally profitable for him. He works really hard all summer long, is able to store up some extra money in the winter when he usually works for a local park and a retail store. This year things have not worked out so well.
The landscaping company had to lay him off about a month earlier than they have in the past. It seems that they lost some lucrative maintenance contracts. The company also lost a couple of big patio instillation projects. With the financial problems, people are having a tough time spending tens of thousands of dollars on well designed, beautiful patios.
On top of all that the skating rink in a very nice suburb he works nights at is not hiring temps, even though they would like to hire him as he has worked there for years, due to budget concerns. His seasonal retail job dried up too, as they are getting rid of regular employees, because no one is out spending money.
He was lucky enough to find a job doing grunt labor at construction sites, framing structures and whatnot, which is very dangerous work and because he cannot find union work it really does not pay anything.
Last Monday, while driving to the worksite, his truck got smashed up due to the carelessness of another driver, causing extensive damage to his truck and missing a days work and pay.
My brother is not one to complain about life or money. But when talking to him on the phone Christmas Eve (he missed dinner, as he had to work a full day, and it was too far for him to get there at any reasonable time) I could tell that he was starting to get worn down by it all.
Tom could use a drink, one that he does not have to pay for.
I was going to submit a story, but I read the last comment and now I really think you should give it to Tom.
Tom, you win!
And Tom's brother, thank you for posting that, it is a heartbreaking story, and has done much this holiday season to make me count my blessings.
Also, Tom's brother, write me an e-mail (dmgrumdahl at mnmo.com) and I will get a package off to you posthaste.
To everyone else: Sorry about the non-posting lately, I had one of those ridiculous convergences of a computer dying and taking a bunch of pre-done blog posts right before I had to get two magazine issues done and then went on vacation... ugh. Sorry. But now I'm back, and after today should have some time to try to put something worthwhile together.
Thanks for all,
-Dara