Another Mouth to Feed

Sorry to drop off the face of the earth for a while. I’ve been busy with the great pleasure of eating hospital food while we ushered in lovely little Tobiah Rae Grumdahl: 7 pounds, 5 ounces, 20 inches long, loud as a tornado siren, and cute as a bean. Baby Tobi is actually a couple weeks old as I write this, and her appearance on earth has once again brought to the fore one of the most dire food-related issues in the Twin Cities: Seriously, who do I have to kill to get decent delivery food in this town?

So far on this convalescence we’ve enjoyed take-out from Jasmine Deli (twice), Lucia’s (thrice), French Meadow, Holy Land, Common Roots, Los Ocampos, the barbecue counter at the Shuang Hur on Nicollet, and—need I even type it, or is it just taken for granted—the holy trinity of south Minneapolis take-out: Lunds, Kowalski’s, and the co-ops. (And let me just say: I’m not knocking take-out; take-out is wonderful.)

But isn’t delivery a little more wonderful? As far as I can tell, now that Rotisseria is closed, the only South Minneapolis food-delivery options are: pizza and pizza-like things from the usual suspects (the likes of which, sadly, do not include Punch or Pizza Nea), sandwiches from places like Golooney’s and Caffrey’s, Chinese from the less desirable Chinese joints, gyros, and burritos from Burrito Loco.

The restaurant-delivery service “Waiters At Your Service” seems to be closed, which doesn’t surprise me. A few years ago, when I tried to write about it, I learned that I needed to set up an account and order a day in advance, which seemed completely antithetical to the spirit of delivery. Another local restaurant delivery service, “mychefexpress.com” does exist, but seems to deliver food only until 2 p.m., which is to say they deliver lunch. But lunch is not a problem. Lunch is why God, in his infinite wisdom, made string cheese and bananas. (Um, yes, you read that right: I’ve been reduced to pilfering my two-year-old’s string-cheese. It’s not foie gras, but it’s not Cheerios off the floor, either, which I imagine is the next step down—and lurking in my future.)

So, please, help! Is there any delivery I’m missing? I just checked the Leaning Tower of Pizza website and learned I can get cigarettes delivered. Well, that would be great—if I smoked. Ooh, and they deliver Red Bull too! Which would be useful if I needed any help at all staying up all night. But I don’t.